I'm not sure how long after my last entry from South Carolina, but sometime afterwards, I had gotten back to Tennessee, delivered, picked up for Florida again. Got to Petro in Florida, idled my truck the night before and slept good because I had the AC blasting. Got up the next morning, grabbed breakfast, got to my delivery and realized that my AC was starting to warm up a little bit. It still had a slight cool to it, but it was not comfortably cold like it should be. More like, warm with a hint of cool, better than outside but still not like "oh wow I'm so cool!"
It had warmed up significantly by the time I got out of Florida. I got my next pickup, made it only to South Carolina, and I slept with my windows down trying to not run the truck (since I had no AC anyway). It was still hot, I still didn't sleep that well. Got up the next morning, hauled ass for North Carolina. Got my load delivered, got to my next pickup which was going from North Carolina to Lebanon Tennessee, all the while still hot as hell! I mean, I had figured that being like 3 states up from Florida, that the temps should be more mild, but I guess we were in the middle of July, so really, it was still like 100 degrees and I was dying.
Before I got to my NC pickup, I was on my way and something got in my boot and started stinging me through my sock on the big bone on the side of my ankle. Hurt like a bitch! I was literally yelling and hitting my foot against the door. I almost wrecked the truck, but I managed to find a big shoulder, whipped the truck off onto the shoulder, got my boot off, and whatever was stinging me. I think it was a wasp or a hornet because all I saw was black. I didn't take time to look at it because I basically got my boot off, brushed my heal off and stomped the hell out of whatever it was. I honestly didn't care at that point what it was, I just wanted it out of my boot and wanted it dead.
I got my pickup, made it to Knoxville because I was going to run out of hours before nashville and I was dying from the heat! I couldn't sleep in the heat again. So thankfully knoxville, the TA there, has the Idleair units where you hook these things up to your window, and pay like 2.50 per hour, and you can have nice cold AC, power, and wify for your 10 hour break. I payed for that, got set up, walked across the street to grab steak and eggs from Iron Skillet, then slept great having the cab of my truck nice and cold. Didn't want to get up the next morning because I was loving it so much!
Got my load delivered probably by like, 12:30, 1pm, tuesday, and had originally had a load back to Florida wednesday but had had that taken off. Ended up going home after delivering my last load, was home tuesday through the following monday. Because of the heat, I felt like complete shit. I knew if I stayed out and kept trying to work while being hot I was going to end up not only having heat exhaustion but possibly end up with heat stroke as well. So, I made my own executive decision and figured I'm going to come home, drink lots and lots of water, hit the pool whenever possible, and try to recover.
The wife wasn't happy I was off the road so long, but I was like "hey, I have to make sure "i'm" ok, and if I keep working in the heat when I'm already struggling, eventually you'll get a call from either a hospital or from the carrier saying that they found my truck on the side of the road with me dead inside." It's gloomy but I felt that it was true.
So I got the ac fixed, ran for the past 2 weeks, and this past week when I was planning out to the end of the week, I saw a load to florida and a load to oklahoma on friday. Both paying about $1200. I haven't been out this way to see my parents in 6 months, and so I booked the oklahoma load. Been here since Sunday afternoon, meant to leave tuesday, but stayed an extra day. Instead I'll be taking back off tomorrow. Don't have a lot of revenue planned for the week because sadly it came to me having to either deadhead to texas or to kansas to get a load. Nothing at all in Oklahoma through interstate. My sister was giving me crap the whole time saying "i see lots of other trucks and they have loads!" I'm like "yeah but they aren't interstate. "
So, I go out tomorrow, run up to kansas, pick up a load, run to illinois, then pick up a load to pa for Michaels, and from there I'm thinking if I can nab one I'll be grabbing starbucks to get me back towards home.
I'm struggling to be positive about everything because things are so hard currently. Hard financially especially. We both work, but it seems like in order to keep the cars and other bills paid, it's on me. I hate feeling that way and I'm hoping it'll get worked out soon. Theres things, major life changes like divorce and repossessions that I really don't want to happen. In fact I'm fighting like hell to try to keep things like that from happening but when things keep feeling like a struggle, and when it seems like no matter how hard I work, how much I make, we are always broke, I sometimes struggle with the faith.
So, I'm doing my best to hang in there, and not give up, not give in, but some days are more of a struggle than others. I just wish I knew what to do that didn't involve me coming off the road and basically trading one career that takes all my time and energy leaving little for the family, to another career that basically does the same. Whats the point? There's no point to come off the road and maybe be home at night but otherwise always be gone or busy and tired and stressed and things never improving. Hell! I'm pretty sure my other half , especially when she talks to her mom in ks, I'm pretty sure she blames me for our financial difficulty even though I know for a fact i'm the reason that our cars, at least our camry hasn't been repossessed. I'm the one that the responsibility of "making the calls to the bills to work things out," has been placed on because "i'm the breadwinner." Well you know what? Some days, being the breadwinner is such a bunch of shit! We are both working, and I wish that it didn't feel like I have to 1) give everything that the other half wants, and 2) still figure out a way to pay for it all. basically blood from a turnip. I'm just so frustrated that some days I'll admit, I heavily consider things that would forever change things between me and my family. I just would fear how things would be afterwards, allimony and stuff like that I've heard can be a real bitch.
So i dunno. Sorry to rant on you all, but I've just had a lot on my mind. So I'll close with that, I hope you all are having a wonderful night/morning. I'll do my best to not let it be so long b4 the next entry. I would have come on here a few days ago, but my computer acted up. Would let me log into windows, but then the desktop would just be black. I had to restore it back to a previously saved version. That took like 6 hours. Then i kept getting a popup error for this anti-malware program. So, tonight, I figured out how to find that program, and i uninstalled the fucker! I'll look through other programs and see if there's other stuff that i can uninstall that might be dragging my computer down. I went with dad the other day to a computer shop and we dropped his computer off to get fixed. It got a virus or something. I love my computer at times, cuz sometimes it works great. Other times it'll take 5 minutes to load and I'm like "WTF?!?!?!!" I'm at the point where if I got the funds, I honestly might just go buy another computer, and keep this one as a backup. But maybe I'll take this one into a computer shop and see if there's anything that can be done to make my computer run the way it should. It's a slightly new computer, only a year since I bought it from Aarons, and it shouldn't have issues like this. I think there's just so much "preventative" crap put on it that it's almost counter productive. It's like "lets put these 20 anti this or anti that programs on here!" Then the computer acts like it doesnt have any speed at all when it actually has decent specs and should run just fine!
So, yeah, on top of the issues at home, and still working to get my online business off the ground, there's the computer issue. I'm just glad I got it working again by restoring to the previously saved point. Otherwise I wouldn't be on here right now!
So anyway, take care yall, and i'll catch ya'll next time. Enjoy some of the pics I took while here!
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